There is a condition known in the psychology world called, separation anxiety. It is mainly seen in small children when parents drop them off at a sitter or at school. Small children start to feel fearful, nervous, and some even experience stomach or headaches. They seem to calm down once they are in the presence of their parents again, but the anxiety returns once they are separated again. For a small time, it is a vicious and consuming cycle that usually hurts both parents and their children. Then, as the children grows up and learns that their parent will return, the fear or anxiety subsides and everyone moves on with his or her lively routines. Or at least this is the norm. Nonetheless, for a while I had been experiencing some separation anxiety of my own and I started thinking of all the parents out their who might have felt the same way I had been feeling.
My children have grown up you see. They have flown the coop, expanded their wings and are now entering into their own young adults lives. And as they make their own decisions and move on with their own lives there is a level of both pride and anxiety that has tried to creep its way into my mind. I started feeling fearful of the world in which they have had to face with its crazy politics and indecisive decision making from the top. My nerves at times have tried to get the best of me and many nights I was going to bed with an immense headache worrying myself to sleep with fears of the “what if’s”. Then, something happened, I realized that I was finally coming around to literally saying goodbye to my children and having to say, “hello,” to my young adults. It wasn’t pretty and for a split second I understood that I was feeling separation anxiety. Our children growing up is so often talked about, but its so hard to face. However, saying good-bye, to all the wonderful stages of their lives is inevitable. One must embrace them as young adults with the same joy one felt when they were first born. The love, the embrace, the feelings will continue to be there, except now, a rock a bye-baby, a favorite blanket, a trip to McDonalds won’t do. Now its time to give them their space, embrace their new journey and understand that every stage in life is beautiful and if one really believes in a higher power then, one understands that our steps, our destiny, our greater purpose is only found when we take that journey in life for ourselves. So, to all the parents out there that are reading this blog, I say, “saying goodbye is never easy, but you can do it if you truly understand the power of love.” And to all the young adults out there that are reading this blog today I say, “love your parents, try to understand that separation anxiety can happen at any age really, and pray that your journey leads you down a fruitful, blissful, path.” Every stage of life is beautiful and we must learn how to enjoy every moment preferably without fear! For perfect love cast out all fear.